Try Our Product?
by Kari Twilight Mist
Summary: Random encounters the different characters in the Twilight universe have with everyday products. Short chapters. Updated randomly. DISCONTINUED
1. Caius and the Just for Men

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or **_**Just for Men**_**!**

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**Caius and the **_**Just for Men**_

**Caius POV**

Stupid Aro. If I have to hear one more jab at how I am the only vampire in Volterra who actually_ looks_ old hair-wise I am going to cut_ his_ hair _off_! I grumbled to myself as I sat down at my computer to check up on the human world news. It was a pastime I picked up from Marcus during one of his phases when he actually cares about something. I clicked out of the pop-ups until I saw one that caught my attention.

It was an advertisement for _Just for Men_ hair dye to cover up white and gray hair. The man in the picture example's hair looked quite natural. If I were to try it everyone would know I dyed my hair but perhaps I wouldn't have to put up with Aro's teasing anymore.

Decided I went to the front desk to ask that human Gianna (Aro_ insisted_ we know her name to make her think we were keeping her. I snorted at that thought) to buy the product.

"Gianna!" I snapped.

"Yes Master Caius?"

"I need you to get me something…"

**3 Days Later**

"Master Caius your product is here."

"Good. I'll take it." I left her without any thanks. I may have to address her by her name but she is in no way my equal.

I went to my chambers to the bathroom to apply the dye.

**2 Hours Later**

I rinsed out the last of the goop in my hair and went to the floor-length mirror on the bathroom door to see what the finished result was.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!" my head looked like it was on FIRE! I checked the package to see if I did the steps right and confirmed that I did.

Just then I heard Marcus outside the door. "Caius, are you alright? Aro wants to hold a meeting. Although we all know he just wants to talk to himself in public again."

"Um… I can't go."

"Why?"

"I… um… have an appointment."

"To where? Aro isn't going to like it then he will complain for the next century you know."

"I know but it's urgent and I can't miss it."

There was a long pause but I knew he hadn't left when he said "you did something to yourself didn't you?"

Damn him for his intuition! "Maybe…" I hedged hoping to salvage some pride.

"Well I'll tell Aro that-"

He was cut off by Aro's voice saying "tell me what? Caius we have a meeting! What are you doing in there?" I heard a snicker I recognized as Demetri's at that.

I sighed and decided to get it over with. I opened the door and was greeted with a stunned silence that was interrupted by Aro saying "wow Caius lookin' good!"

The really sad thing was he meant it.

**AN/ "Aro wants to hold a meeting. Although we all know he just wants to talk to himself in public again." Is possibly the funniest thing I have ever written on here in my opinion.**


	2. Edward and the GPS

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or, Volvo, or ****any GPS systems****!**

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***It doesn't really matter what GPS it is so pick whatever one you want it to be***

**Edward and the GPS**

**Edward POV**

I climbed into my Volvo and turned the key. Once the screen lit up I entered the address of the jewelry shop in Seattle I wanted into the GPS. I pulled out of the drive and got on to the main road when I heard "Turn Left at the next exit."

_Odd. _I thought seeing as I had never heard of a route to Seattle that way. I shrugged but did as it said.

"Head East 2.5 miles."

Once again I was confused but went along with it.

"Take the next exit northward."

I was starting to get a little worried that the GPS was off but figured Alice would have called me if that was the case.

"At the next exit take a right."

_Take a right? There_ is_ no right!_

I continued of for a half hour after discovering I was thoroughly lost due to the stupid GPS and had left my cell phone at home!

Just when I thought I was headed back I saw a brightly colored sign by the side of the road happily reading "Welcome to Idaho!"

**I know it's really short sorry!**


	3. Bella and the Fortune Cookie

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any fortune cookies or Chinese food places!**

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**Bella and the Fortune Cookie**

**Bella POV**

"This is really good fried rice!" I mumbled to Edward as I scarfed down the take-out carton.

"I'm not feeding you enough." He muttered back for what seemed like the thousandth time. I just rolled my eyes in response. When I was done eating Edward presented me with my fortune cookie.

I cleared my throat and read "_**You will soon find yourself making a big change**__._ See Edward even the fortune cookies agree with me!"

He sighed in exasperation and took the piece of paper from me and turned it over. "Oh look Bella it says your lottery numbers are _**10-6-23-5-32-8**_!" **(A/N: I have no idea if I have the right amount of guesses or how high you can guess right. Sorry.) **

Just then Alice walked into the room and said "no they aren't in Washington but they are in Nevada!" then walked out.

"See Bella the fortune is wrong." Edward said smugly.

"Let me see that!" I grabbed the slip of paper from him and read it aloud to myself "_**The winning lottery numbers are 10-6-23-5-32-8**_!" I smirked at him "See Edward? It doesn't say they are MY winning numbers just that they ARE winning numbers."

He huffed and growled "just eat the cookie, Bella."

**So I've come to the conclusion that these will all end up, unintentionally, short. Sorry.**


	4. Emmett and the Sparkle Paper Towels

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, Walmart, or _Sparkle_ Paper Towels!**

** This is based on a TRUE story that I told to **4everhis91** and they encouraged me to make it a story so here it is. **

** (By the way I took pictures with my phone since the irony was too good.)**

** I have a poll up I really want your opinion on!**

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** Emmett and the _Sparkle_ Paper Towels**

**Emmett POV**

_Walmart._ Why did we have to shop at Walmart? You see when Esme says "We're just going in for less than 10 minutes" she means "bring a deer to go because this could take a few years."

I let out a loud sigh and continued pushing the cart past a whole bunch of parents and kids looking for school supplies like my family. Alice was trying to find the pinkest things possible and Edward was mumbling aloud about which notebook paper was the best quality. I snorted. _Nerd. _He turned to glare at me and Esme noticed.

"Emmett dear why don't you find the things on this list?" she asked pulling out a 5-page double-sided list from her purse. I sighed louder and walked off. Grumbling I collected the bleach, hand sanitizer (what is she _thinking_?!), booklight Edward wanted for Bella, and so on.

It was then I passed it. Paper towels. _Sparkle_ Paper Towels "with thirst pockets"! **(Image of logo will be on my profile since it really does say that)** I couldn't help it. I fell to the ground laughing.

I heard Alice and Edward laughing then too as they approached me. "Here Emmett I brought a camera" Alice said.

Just then Esme walked up to us and scolded "what do you all think you're doing? You are being MUCH too loud!" I then showed her the logo and she burst into giggles as well.

_Maybe Walmart isn't so bad after all._


End file.
